I Just Want to Walk on the Treadmill, OK?

It’s story time, folks. This will be half rant, half triumphant tale of victory. And it’s all about… a treadmill.

It’s not secret that I’m not the most athletic or fitness-obsessed individual. I mean, I just recently wrote a post about WALKING a 5K. So yeah, you get it. But I do like to walk before work to get my steps in and help to wake me up, and usually I do that on a treadmill. It’s early, it’s dark, it’s too hot or too cold outside; it’s just the best option. So when I was looking for a new apartment, I was extremely happy to see that my new complex had a 24/7 gym with 2 treadmills! Awesome! Right? Right? I thought so, too.

After finally feeling settled enough and unpacking enough that I found my workout clothes, I woke up early one morning and headed over to the 24/7 gym to walk before work. But when I got there, I couldn’t figure out how to get the treadmills to work! One of them just had no lights on at all (was it plugged in? yes…) and the other one just wouldn’t do anything no matter what buttons I pushed. What was going on? What was I doing wrong? Were they BOTH just broken? I moved on to the stationary bike after my walking fail.

Later that day, I called the apartment office just to let them know that they had broken equipment. Here’s how that conversation went…

Kelly: Hi there, I was trying to use the treadmills this morning in your gym and I think both of them are broken. I just wanted to make sure you guys were aware.
Office: Umm, no they aren’t broken… someone is using one of them right now.
Kelly: Oh… uhh, ok… so obviously I’m just dumb, can you maybe walk me through how to get them working? I just could NOT figure it out.
Office: Well it’s easy! You just take the safety magnet, put it in place, and then start using the treadmill.
Kelly: Yeah, ok, that makes sense! I guess I just didn’t see them… they weren’t near the treadmills, right? I didn’t see them anywhere…
Office: Oh no, we don’t keep them in the gym at all. We keep them in the office so they don’t get stolen. That way we won’t have to replace them.
Kelly: …………..ok so then how do I use the treadmills?
Office: You come in to the office, borrow the magnet, and use them.
Kelly: Ohhhh ok, so I can just come in, borrow the magnet, use it the next morning, and then drop it off later?
Office: No, you’d have to turn it back in before the office closed.
Kelly: ……… ok, so since I have a full time job and leave before the office opens and get home after the office closes, you’re saying that I can just never use the treadmills?
Office: Yes, that is correct.
Kelly: ……… ok, so can I give you some sort of collateral to borrow it? Like, a $20 bill maybe? And then when I bring the magnet back I get my $20 back?
Office: Ummm, no… we can’t do that.
Kelly: Yeah I know… just thought I’d ask. So I’m just throwing it out there, you probably shouldn’t say that you have a 24/7 gym when only half of the equipment is available.
Office: We DO have a 24/7 gym… you just can’t use all of it all of the time.
Kelly: That’s what I’m saying, it’s a bit deceptive. Maybe you should start telling people that.
Office: Sorry…….?
Kelly: It’s fine….. Thanks for the info.

Kelly got a big sassy… but really… it’s a bit ridiculous that they think these magnets are going to get stolen. Why would anybody want to steal it??! And better yet, DO I NOW HAVE TO WALK OUTSIDE? What will I do in the winter? Or if it’s raining? I just want to walk on the treadmill, ok?

I sulked a little bit. I complained a lot. But then I got to thinking… hey. If the magnets did get stolen, then they would have to replace them… They’d have to buy a new one… Probably on the internet… Which means that maybe I could buy one on the internet… Oooooh yeah, this could be interesting…

So I went back to the gym, took down the make and model of the treadmill, AND I WENT ONLINE AND I FOUND A STORE THAT SOLD REPLACEMENT PARTS AND I BOUGHT MY OWN TREADMILL SAFETY MAGNET!!!!!! Mwahahaha I am cheating the system and I LOVE it!

Seriously, it’s the best $22 I’ve spend in a while. And that’s a little expensive for a silly little magnet, but I figure it’s cheaper than paying for a monthly gym membership JUST so I can walk indoors. Right?!? Right.

So now I can walk indoors any time I want. The end.

5 thoughts on “I Just Want to Walk on the Treadmill, OK?

  1. Wow! Yeah, I don’t blame you for getting sassy on that one. That’s both terrible and hilarious. Glad you found a solution though. Only cost $2 more than you were willing to give them initially.

    Shame on them for being deceptive like that though.

  2. That has got to be the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard!! A 24/7 gym without the 24/7 access to equipment!? I would have done the same thing. Cheat the system girl!!

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