I had my end of the year performance review at work at the beginning of the week, and it was… interesting.
Actually it went pretty well (because of my outstanding performance, obviously) but there were a few factors that made it so ‘interesting.’ 1- since my little team just got moved to a new department, that means that we have a new boss, too, who knows nothing about my performance. 2- the software that the company uses for these reviews wasn’t working, so we just had to try and remember what we wrote. 3- this new boss sits on a different floor and because we don’t get a lot of face time, he knows basically nothing about me.
All those factors thrown together meant that my review basically turned into a personal interview. “Tell me about yourself.” “Where did you go to school?” “What other jobs have you had?” “Why did you apply for your current job?” “What excites you about the company?” “WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN 5 YEARS?”
That’s a good question………
Why don’t I have a 5 year plan?
What are my goals? What are goals?
Why don’t I have an answer for this?
Why am I still sitting here being silent, I should probably say something….
I ended up spouting out a very generic answer, and it was obvious. He was nice and said that it’s ok if I don’t know, but it’s something I should think about. Uhhh yeah, you’re right; it IS something I should be thinking about… right? I went back to my desk and tried to think about it and came up with
the best plan with all of my new goals lined out and smart steps to get there nothing. Absolutely nothing.
Do I seriously not have any career goals? Is that even allowed? I can probably say where I don’t want my career to go, but as far as where I want to be in 5 years… yikes. I feel like I need to change that, but whenever I think about it, I just draw a big scary blank.
Do I take the safe route and stay on my current career path? Do I take a step in another direction in my company and try something new? Do I take a leap of faith and change everything all together?
I have no idea. Were you hoping for some great resolution to my problem? Sorry, I’ve still got nothing. Still.
But I do have a different answer to where I want to be in 5 years. I want to be happy and living my best possible life for the Lord. There’s my answer.
I might not know where I want my career to go, but I’m honestly ok with that right now.
There’s no use in stressing out over what I don’t know. Like the great Clay Aiken (hah) sang, “If you want to make God laugh, all you’ve gotta do is tell Him your plans.” I know that was a quote before him. Moving on.
I don’t need to stress about what career path to take, because I put my faith in God and that He will provide opportunities that will lead to the best path for me and get me where I’m supposed to go.
Instead of worrying about what company I’ll be working for, I will focus on being a good witness to my coworkers.
Rather than place pressure on myself to get so many promotions in a certain period of time, I will focus on being a diligent worker and trying hard with what I’m doing now.
I’m still going to try and do my best and find my way in my career and advance myself, but I’m just deciding that I don’t need to worry about it and stress about it right now. I know that ultimately, my worth doesn’t come from my position at work. My value doesn’t come from promotions. Those things really won’t matter when I’m dead, and I should focus on things that are eternal. So where will I be in 5 years? I have no idea. But as long as I’m somewhat happy and a good daughter, sister, aunt, friend, employee, and believer, I think I’ll be just fine.